1. Why does the sun lighten our hair, but darken our skin?
2. Why can't women put on mascara with their mouth closed?
3. Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
4. Why don't you ever see the headline Psychic Wins Lottery?
5. Why is abbreviated such a long word?
6. Why is a boxing ring square?
7. Why is it considered necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin?
8. Why is it that doctors call what they do practice?
9. Why is it that rain drops but snow falls?
10. Why is it that to stop Windows 98, you have to click on Start?
11. Why is it that when you're driving and looking for an address, you turn down the volume on the radio?
12. Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?
13. Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
14. Why is the third hand on the watch called a second hand?
15. Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
16. Why isn't there a special name for the tops of your feet?
17. Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?
18. If you throw a cat out of the car window, does it become kitty litter?
19. If you take an Asian person and spin him around several times does he become disoriented?
20. Is it OK to use the AM radio after noon?
21. What do people in China call their good plates?
22. What do you call a male ladybug?
23. What hair color do they put on the driver's license of a bald man?
24. Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
25. Why do they call it a pair of pants, but only 1 bra?
26. Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot at them?
27. Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive?
28. Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?
29. Why are there Interstates in Hawaii?
30. Why are there flotation devices in the seats of planes instead of parachutes?
31. Why are cigarettes sold at gas stations where smoking is prohibited?
32. Have you ever imagined a world without hypothetical situations?
33. How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work?
34. If the 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why does it have locks on the door?
35. You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of it?
36. If a firefighter fights fire and a crime fighter fights crime, what does a freedom fighter fight?
37. If they squeeze olives to get olive oil, how do they get baby oil?
38. If a cow laughs, does milk come out of her nose?
39. If you are driving at the speed of light and you turn your headlights on, what happens?
40. Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of a drive-up ATM?
41. Why is it that when you transport something by car it is called shipment, but when you transport something by ship it's called cargo?
42. Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
43. Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?
44. If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?
45. If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?
1. Why does the sun lighten our hair, but darken our skin?
dunno but i'll go with the theres melanin in our skin but not in our hair?? (seriously.. dunno)
2. Why can't women put on mascara with their mouth closed?
cuz it wouldnt be the same?? it might go on crooked if we closed our mouths. it messes up the equilibrium of the application…(lol)
3. Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
Never thought about that before… maybe cuz it needs the air to harden? It's not getting much of a breeze in there.
4. Why don't you ever see the headline Psychic Wins Lottery?
Apparently.. (this i DO know) there's some kind of "moral code"…."ethics" if you will that makes it a big NO NO to use the "gift" for that type of "personal gain".
5. Why is abbreviated such a long word?
So that you think about it enough to ask it out loud to see if someone else knows the answer so you can feel satiated..lol
6. Why is a boxing ring square?
so they'd have a "corner" to retreat to.. Where they gonna go in a circle?? (duh..lol)
7. Why is it considered necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin?
Ok.. i guess (again, i know this one).. something about back in the days they tied strings around peoples fingers because i guess when people fainted, went into a coma, etc they were PERCEIVED as dead…but were really just unconcious and the tied string was connected to a bell that would ring if the person was still alive after a few days.. I guess they nailed it so they could safely dig em out rather than have them try and open it on their own and have the dirt cave in on them thus suffocating them……or so i heard thats what thats all about.
8. Why is it that doctors call what they do practice?
uh, practice makes perfect? lol.. There's a new method coming out all the time.. they're no longer in school so they gotta learn how to do it somehow.. so they gotta practice on us living folks.
9. Why is it that rain drops but snow falls?
Rain is heavier…(something about density..
10. Why is it that to stop Windows 98, you have to click on Start?
Really?? i always ctrl, alt, del'd myself…lol
11. Why is it that when you're driving and looking for an address, you turn down the volume on the radio?
I've never done that.. but I DO however turn the radio down when i'm parallel parking..but that's only cuz i wanna HEAR when i'm hitting the car behind me…lol.
12. Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?
dude.. where does baby oil come from?? nobody knows.. you don't ask no questions.. you just use it blindly and move on.
13. Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
I think you just answered your own question on this one.
14. Why is the third hand on the watch called a second hand?
cuz it tells the seconds of the day?
15. Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour? Cuz everybody "rushed" out of work to get wherever they're going thus jamming up the streets and highways.
16. Why isn't there a special name for the tops of your feet?
wow… dunno.. ya got me there…(simply FEET aint good enough for you?? ) lol
17. Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?
Ya know, it's funny.. my cats NEVER ate mice.. my DOG however treats it like its a delicacy.. like its CAVIAR or somethin..he LOVES them!!
18. If you throw a cat out of the car window, does it become kitty litter?
I'd imagine it would be "kitty litter".. but by that, not only would you get the littering fine..but i'd imagine one for animal cruelty as well.
19. If you take an Asian person and spin him around several times does he become disoriented?
Not sure what that means so i can't come up with a witty comment. (was i being witty with previous answers? i hope so.. i was aiming for it).
20. Is it OK to use the AM radio after noon?
yea.. sure.. why not.. who's gonna know anyway.. nobody listens to that band anyhow..
21. What do people in China call their good plates?
HAHA!!! good one… no witty come back for that one.. that's a stumper right there…lol
22. What do you call a male ladybug?
MR bug?
23. What hair color do they put on the driver's license of a bald man?
WOW.. i could say stuff but i'd probably get banned.. so NEXT…
24. Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
Never understood that one.. maybe they thought it would be cruel to kill him WITH the ebola virus?? lol.. dunno
25. Why do they call it a pair of pants, but only 1 bra?
again.. just put em on.. don't ask no questions.. its just one of those things you just come to accept in life.
26. Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot at them?
Cuz tourists aren't GAME?
27. Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive?
well, you DON'T "need" a drivers license.. you can get it with any state issued ID…(where do YOU live? and remind me not to go THERE…lol)
28. Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?
again dont ask, don't tell
29. Why are there Interstates in Hawaii?
So they could mess with our minds man.
30. Why are there flotation devices in the seats of planes instead of parachutes?
cuz they don't want you to drown after falling 30k feet out of the air into the water.. that would just be cruel and unusual punishment.
31. Why are cigarettes sold at gas stations where smoking is prohibited?
they sell minute cards for cell phones too even though you shouldn't use it while pumping…but the thing is, just cuz you buy it there doesn't mean you can USE it there.
32. Have you ever imagined a world without hypothetical situations?
THE HORRORS!!! no.. that's unimaginable.
33. How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work?
why in the snowplow of course
34. If the 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why does it have locks on the door?
dunno, we don't have one in my area.. don't know procedure and protocol.
35. You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of it?
i myself asked this question and i think i recall something about the material it's made out of isn't conducive to what's needed for flying….(or was it the weight?? lol.. i can't remember).
36. If a firefighter fights fire and a crime fighter fights crime, what does a freedom fighter fight?
i'm gonna go with freedom
37. If they squeeze olives to get olive oil, how do they get baby oil?
definately answered this earlier before i even saw this one.
38. If a cow laughs, does milk come out of her nose?
nope….grass does.. you see all that "cud" they be chewin??
39. If you are driving at the speed of light and you turn your headlights on, what happens?
uh, you can see better? dunno
40. Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of a drive-up ATM?
ok.. you got me there again.
41. Why is it that when you transport something by car it is called shipment, but when you transport something by ship it's called cargo?
why park in a driveway and drive on a parkway.. you just do.. again, don't ask no questions.. just accept it.
42. Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
cuz they werent put in the dryer.
43. Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?
so.. COMpartments would have been better?
44. If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?
uh YEAH
45. If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?
fancy word for station..
WHEW.. i'm dun.. i'm tired.. i'm goin to bed… hope i cleared some of that up…lol
i really have NO life…