1. Why does the sun lighten our hair, but darken our skin?
2. Why can't women put on mascara with their mouth closed?
3. Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
4. Why don't you ever see the headline Psychic Wins Lottery?
5. Why is abbreviated such a long word?
6. Why is a boxing ring square?
7. Why is it considered necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin?
8. Why is it that doctors call what they do practice?
9. Why is it that rain drops but snow falls?
10. Why is it that to stop Windows 98, you have to click on Start?
11. Why is it that when you're driving and looking for an address, you turn down the volume on the radio?
12. Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?
13. Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
14. Why is the third hand on the watch called a second hand?
15. Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
16. Why isn't there a special name for the tops of your feet?
17. Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?
18. If you throw a cat out of the car window, does it become kitty litter?
19. If you take an Asian person and spin him around several times does he become disoriented?
20. Is it OK to use the AM radio after noon?
21. What do people in China call their good plates?
22. What do you call a male ladybug?
23. What hair color do they put on the driver's license of a bald man?
24. Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
25. Why do they call it a pair of pants, but only 1 bra?
26. Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot at them?
27. Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive?
28. Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?
29. Why are there Interstates in Hawaii?
30. Why are there flotation devices in the seats of planes instead of parachutes?
31. Why are cigarettes sold at gas stations where smoking is prohibited?
32. Have you ever imagined a world without hypothetical situations?
33. How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work?
34. If the 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why does it have locks on the door?
35. You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of it?
36. If a firefighter fights fire and a crime fighter fights crime, what does a freedom fighter fight?
37. If they squeeze olives to get olive oil, how do they get baby oil?
38. If a cow laughs, does milk come out of her nose?
39. If you are driving at the speed of light and you turn your headlights on, what happens?
40. Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of a drive-up ATM?
41. Why is it that when you transport something by car it is called shipment, but when you transport something by ship it's called cargo?
42. Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
43. Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?
44. If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?
45. If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?
1. Why does the sun lighten our hair, but darken our skin?
dunno but i'll go with the theres melanin in our skin but not in our hair?? (seriously.. dunno)
2. Why can't women put on mascara with their mouth closed?
cuz it wouldnt be the same?? it might go on crooked if we closed our mouths. it messes up the equilibrium of the application…(lol)
3. Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
Never thought about that before… maybe cuz it needs the air to harden? It's not getting much of a breeze in there.
4. Why don't you ever see the headline Psychic Wins Lottery?
Apparently.. (this i DO know) there's some kind of "moral code"…."ethics" if you will that makes it a big NO NO to use the "gift" for that type of "personal gain".
5. Why is abbreviated such a long word?
So that you think about it enough to ask it out loud to see if someone else knows the answer so you can feel satiated..lol
6. Why is a boxing ring square?
so they'd have a "corner" to retreat to.. Where they gonna go in a circle?? (duh..lol)
7. Why is it considered necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin?
Ok.. i guess (again, i know this one).. something about back in the days they tied strings around peoples fingers because i guess when people fainted, went into a coma, etc they were PERCEIVED as dead…but were really just unconcious and the tied string was connected to a bell that would ring if the person was still alive after a few days.. I guess they nailed it so they could safely dig em out rather than have them try and open it on their own and have the dirt cave in on them thus suffocating them……or so i heard thats what thats all about.
8. Why is it that doctors call what they do practice?
uh, practice makes perfect? lol.. There's a new method coming out all the time.. they're no longer in school so they gotta learn how to do it somehow.. so they gotta practice on us living folks.
9. Why is it that rain drops but snow falls?
Rain is heavier…(something about density..
10. Why is it that to stop Windows 98, you have to click on Start?
Really?? i always ctrl, alt, del'd myself…lol
11. Why is it that when you're driving and looking for an address, you turn down the volume on the radio?
I've never done that.. but I DO however turn the radio down when i'm parallel parking..but that's only cuz i wanna HEAR when i'm hitting the car behind me…lol.
12. Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?
dude.. where does baby oil come from?? nobody knows.. you don't ask no questions.. you just use it blindly and move on.
13. Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
I think you just answered your own question on this one.
14. Why is the third hand on the watch called a second hand?
cuz it tells the seconds of the day?
15. Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour? Cuz everybody "rushed" out of work to get wherever they're going thus jamming up the streets and highways.
16. Why isn't there a special name for the tops of your feet?
wow… dunno.. ya got me there…(simply FEET aint good enough for you?? ) lol
17. Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?
Ya know, it's funny.. my cats NEVER ate mice.. my DOG however treats it like its a delicacy.. like its CAVIAR or somethin..he LOVES them!!
18. If you throw a cat out of the car window, does it become kitty litter?
I'd imagine it would be "kitty litter".. but by that, not only would you get the littering fine..but i'd imagine one for animal cruelty as well.
19. If you take an Asian person and spin him around several times does he become disoriented?
Not sure what that means so i can't come up with a witty comment. (was i being witty with previous answers? i hope so.. i was aiming for it).
20. Is it OK to use the AM radio after noon?
yea.. sure.. why not.. who's gonna know anyway.. nobody listens to that band anyhow..
21. What do people in China call their good plates?
HAHA!!! good one… no witty come back for that one.. that's a stumper right there…lol
22. What do you call a male ladybug?
MR bug?
23. What hair color do they put on the driver's license of a bald man?
WOW.. i could say stuff but i'd probably get banned.. so NEXT…
24. Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
Never understood that one.. maybe they thought it would be cruel to kill him WITH the ebola virus?? lol.. dunno
25. Why do they call it a pair of pants, but only 1 bra?
again.. just put em on.. don't ask no questions.. its just one of those things you just come to accept in life.
26. Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot at them?
Cuz tourists aren't GAME?
27. Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive?
well, you DON'T "need" a drivers license.. you can get it with any state issued ID…(where do YOU live? and remind me not to go THERE…lol)
28. Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?
again dont ask, don't tell
29. Why are there Interstates in Hawaii?
So they could mess with our minds man.
30. Why are there flotation devices in the seats of planes instead of parachutes?
cuz they don't want you to drown after falling 30k feet out of the air into the water.. that would just be cruel and unusual punishment.
31. Why are cigarettes sold at gas stations where smoking is prohibited?
they sell minute cards for cell phones too even though you shouldn't use it while pumping…but the thing is, just cuz you buy it there doesn't mean you can USE it there.
32. Have you ever imagined a world without hypothetical situations?
THE HORRORS!!! no.. that's unimaginable.
33. How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work?
why in the snowplow of course
34. If the 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why does it have locks on the door?
dunno, we don't have one in my area.. don't know procedure and protocol.
35. You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of it?
i myself asked this question and i think i recall something about the material it's made out of isn't conducive to what's needed for flying….(or was it the weight?? lol.. i can't remember).
36. If a firefighter fights fire and a crime fighter fights crime, what does a freedom fighter fight?
i'm gonna go with freedom
37. If they squeeze olives to get olive oil, how do they get baby oil?
definately answered this earlier before i even saw this one.
38. If a cow laughs, does milk come out of her nose?
nope….grass does.. you see all that "cud" they be chewin??
39. If you are driving at the speed of light and you turn your headlights on, what happens?
uh, you can see better? dunno
40. Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of a drive-up ATM?
ok.. you got me there again.
41. Why is it that when you transport something by car it is called shipment, but when you transport something by ship it's called cargo?
why park in a driveway and drive on a parkway.. you just do.. again, don't ask no questions.. just accept it.
42. Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
cuz they werent put in the dryer.
43. Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?
so.. COMpartments would have been better?
44. If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?
uh YEAH
45. If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?
fancy word for station..
WHEW.. i'm dun.. i'm tired.. i'm goin to bed… hope i cleared some of that up…lol
i really have NO life…
January 6th, 2008 at 8:24 pm
I don't know why
good questions!
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January 6th, 2008 at 8:24 pm
NOoooooo Way!
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January 6th, 2008 at 8:24 pm
interesting questions, but this is too long to answer.
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January 6th, 2008 at 8:24 pm
haha. niice. especially number 8. : ]
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January 6th, 2008 at 8:24 pm
umm… yeah I'll get back to you on that
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January 6th, 2008 at 8:25 pm
I get your point!! lol ♥
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January 6th, 2008 at 8:25 pm
How about interesting
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January 6th, 2008 at 8:25 pm
Past and copy really helped you transfer all this junk.Good luck with your answers.
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January 6th, 2008 at 8:26 pm
1-cause its cool like that
2-that will always be a mystery
22- a dude bug
45-thats just what they WANT you to think
if u came up with these on yourown, impressive
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January 6th, 2008 at 8:27 pm
lol, interesting questions.
☺♥☺
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January 6th, 2008 at 8:30 pm
Some funny questions, some "corny", some, ah, yes, as you put it "stupid". Sorry, I cannot answer anyone of them.
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January 6th, 2008 at 8:39 pm
1. Isn't the sun just de'lightful'?
2. I think the opening of the mouth triggers concentration..?
3. Don't you love how glue is only sticky when it needs to be?
4. You've never seen that phrase…?
5. But don't you like long words?
6. Would you rather the ring be circle?
7. Who nails coffins?
8. Doesn't practice make perfect?
9. Have you ever seen rain lift and snow rise?
10. Isn't it true that to stop you must first start?
11. You turn down the radio?
12. I always thought dishwashing soap was made with oranges..?
Skipping 13-26…
27. Mm, last I checked, drivers licenses have age..?
Skipping 28-41…
42. Doesn't the rain "drop" around the sheep?
43. Would you like them to be apart?
44. Is progress considered anything besides "moving forward"?
45. Don't you think they terminate all the bad ones?
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January 6th, 2008 at 8:41 pm
1. Why does the sun lighten our hair, but darken our skin?
theres differnt things in our hair then our skin
2. Why can't women put on mascara with their mouth closed?
i can! but some r just weird
3. Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
becasue theres compressed air in there
4. Why don't you ever see the headline Psychic Wins Lottery?
very nice!
5. Why is abbreviated such a long word?
becuase the people who made up english suck!
6. Why is a boxing ring square?
becaseu a box is squatre!
7. Why is it considered necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin?
u dont want them walking out of it in the middle of the night now do u!
8. Why is it that doctors call what they do practice?
becaseu they could mess up and kill u
9. Why is it that rain drops but snow falls?
becasue rains falls faster than snow
10. Why is it that to stop Windows 98, you have to click on Start?
becasuse to start something u first have to stop something???
11. Why is it that when you're driving and looking for an address, you turn down the volume on the radio?
so u can here the people in the car yelling at u when u drive past it
12. Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?
so it gets the grease out
13. Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
becasue when he dies hes broke?
14. Why is the third hand on the watch called a second hand?
nah-ah is it now?
15. Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
no its not…is it?
16. Why isn't there a special name for the tops of your feet?
istn there enough weird names for the body as it is
17. Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?
becasue thats icky
18. If you throw a cat out of the car window, does it become kitty litter?
idk…if u run over a bird does it become chicken?
19. If you take an Asian person and spin him around several times does he become disoriented?
well duh! :-p
20. Is it OK to use the AM radio after noon?
as long as ur happy
21. What do people in China call their good plates?
have no idea what ur talking about
22. What do you call a male ladybug?
becasue hes preeeety
23. What hair color do they put on the driver's license of a bald man?
white? haha idk
24. Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
cause its a law
25. Why do they call it a pair of pants, but only 1 bra?
becasue…OoOo…hmmmm..touche!
26. Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot at them?
why would u want to shoot at them?
27. Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive?
u can just have an identification card..u dont need a license
28. Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?
becauase there trying to trick u!
29. Why are there Interstates in Hawaii?
haha no way!
30. Why are there flotation devices in the seats of planes instead of parachutes?
becasue they cant afford that
31. Why are cigarettes sold at gas stations where smoking is prohibited?
becaseu gas stations are gross, just like smoking
32. Have you ever imagined a world without hypothetical situations?
heck no!
33. How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work?
ON THE SNOWPLOW SILLY!
34. If the 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why does it have locks on the door?
those silly people!
35. You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of it?
to expensive
36. If a firefighter fights fire and a crime fighter fights crime, what does a freedom fighter fight?'
for peace
37. If they squeeze olives to get olive oil, how do they get baby oil?
eeewwwww!!!!
38. If a cow laughs, does milk come out of her nose?
out of her utters
39. If you are driving at the speed of light and you turn your headlights on, what happens?
then they turn to bright lights
40. Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of a drive-up ATM?
haha oh i know!!!! thats so weird
41. Why is it that when you transport something by car it is called shipment, but when you transport something by ship it's called cargo?
becaseu thats the way the cookie crumbles
42. Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
becasue then theyre would be any sheep at all!
43. Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?
becasue there itty bitty?
44. If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?
YES!
45. If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal? ouchies…thats no good
AAAHHHHHH!!! I DID IT!!!
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January 6th, 2008 at 8:42 pm
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA you just made my day!!!!
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January 6th, 2008 at 8:45 pm
Food for thought, without a doubt! *sm*
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January 6th, 2008 at 8:52 pm
1. Why does the sun lighten our hair, but darken our skin?
dunno but i'll go with the theres melanin in our skin but not in our hair?? (seriously.. dunno)
2. Why can't women put on mascara with their mouth closed?
cuz it wouldnt be the same?? it might go on crooked if we closed our mouths. it messes up the equilibrium of the application…(lol)
3. Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
Never thought about that before… maybe cuz it needs the air to harden? It's not getting much of a breeze in there.
4. Why don't you ever see the headline Psychic Wins Lottery?
Apparently.. (this i DO know) there's some kind of "moral code"…."ethics" if you will that makes it a big NO NO to use the "gift" for that type of "personal gain".
5. Why is abbreviated such a long word?
So that you think about it enough to ask it out loud to see if someone else knows the answer so you can feel satiated..lol
6. Why is a boxing ring square?
so they'd have a "corner" to retreat to.. Where they gonna go in a circle?? (duh..lol)
7. Why is it considered necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin?
Ok.. i guess (again, i know this one).. something about back in the days they tied strings around peoples fingers because i guess when people fainted, went into a coma, etc they were PERCEIVED as dead…but were really just unconcious and the tied string was connected to a bell that would ring if the person was still alive after a few days.. I guess they nailed it so they could safely dig em out rather than have them try and open it on their own and have the dirt cave in on them thus suffocating them……or so i heard thats what thats all about.
8. Why is it that doctors call what they do practice?
uh, practice makes perfect? lol.. There's a new method coming out all the time.. they're no longer in school so they gotta learn how to do it somehow.. so they gotta practice on us living folks.
9. Why is it that rain drops but snow falls?
Rain is heavier…(something about density..
10. Why is it that to stop Windows 98, you have to click on Start?
Really?? i always ctrl, alt, del'd myself…lol
11. Why is it that when you're driving and looking for an address, you turn down the volume on the radio?
I've never done that.. but I DO however turn the radio down when i'm parallel parking..but that's only cuz i wanna HEAR when i'm hitting the car behind me…lol.
12. Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?
dude.. where does baby oil come from?? nobody knows.. you don't ask no questions.. you just use it blindly and move on.
13. Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
I think you just answered your own question on this one.
14. Why is the third hand on the watch called a second hand?
cuz it tells the seconds of the day?
15. Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour? Cuz everybody "rushed" out of work to get wherever they're going thus jamming up the streets and highways.
16. Why isn't there a special name for the tops of your feet?
wow… dunno.. ya got me there…(simply FEET aint good enough for you?? ) lol
17. Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?
Ya know, it's funny.. my cats NEVER ate mice.. my DOG however treats it like its a delicacy.. like its CAVIAR or somethin..he LOVES them!!
18. If you throw a cat out of the car window, does it become kitty litter?
I'd imagine it would be "kitty litter".. but by that, not only would you get the littering fine..but i'd imagine one for animal cruelty as well.
19. If you take an Asian person and spin him around several times does he become disoriented?
Not sure what that means so i can't come up with a witty comment. (was i being witty with previous answers? i hope so.. i was aiming for it).
20. Is it OK to use the AM radio after noon?
yea.. sure.. why not.. who's gonna know anyway.. nobody listens to that band anyhow..
21. What do people in China call their good plates?
HAHA!!! good one… no witty come back for that one.. that's a stumper right there…lol
22. What do you call a male ladybug?
MR bug?
23. What hair color do they put on the driver's license of a bald man?
WOW.. i could say stuff but i'd probably get banned.. so NEXT…
24. Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
Never understood that one.. maybe they thought it would be cruel to kill him WITH the ebola virus?? lol.. dunno
25. Why do they call it a pair of pants, but only 1 bra?
again.. just put em on.. don't ask no questions.. its just one of those things you just come to accept in life.
26. Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot at them?
Cuz tourists aren't GAME?
27. Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive?
well, you DON'T "need" a drivers license.. you can get it with any state issued ID…(where do YOU live? and remind me not to go THERE…lol)
28. Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?
again dont ask, don't tell
29. Why are there Interstates in Hawaii?
So they could mess with our minds man.
30. Why are there flotation devices in the seats of planes instead of parachutes?
cuz they don't want you to drown after falling 30k feet out of the air into the water.. that would just be cruel and unusual punishment.
31. Why are cigarettes sold at gas stations where smoking is prohibited?
they sell minute cards for cell phones too even though you shouldn't use it while pumping…but the thing is, just cuz you buy it there doesn't mean you can USE it there.
32. Have you ever imagined a world without hypothetical situations?
THE HORRORS!!! no.. that's unimaginable.
33. How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work?
why in the snowplow of course
34. If the 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why does it have locks on the door?
dunno, we don't have one in my area.. don't know procedure and protocol.
35. You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of it?
i myself asked this question and i think i recall something about the material it's made out of isn't conducive to what's needed for flying….(or was it the weight?? lol.. i can't remember).
36. If a firefighter fights fire and a crime fighter fights crime, what does a freedom fighter fight?
i'm gonna go with freedom
37. If they squeeze olives to get olive oil, how do they get baby oil?
definately answered this earlier before i even saw this one.
38. If a cow laughs, does milk come out of her nose?
nope….grass does.. you see all that "cud" they be chewin??
39. If you are driving at the speed of light and you turn your headlights on, what happens?
uh, you can see better? dunno
40. Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of a drive-up ATM?
ok.. you got me there again.
41. Why is it that when you transport something by car it is called shipment, but when you transport something by ship it's called cargo?
why park in a driveway and drive on a parkway.. you just do.. again, don't ask no questions.. just accept it.
42. Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
cuz they werent put in the dryer.
43. Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?
so.. COMpartments would have been better?
44. If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?
uh YEAH
45. If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?
fancy word for station..
WHEW.. i'm dun.. i'm tired.. i'm goin to bed… hope i cleared some of that up…lol
i really have NO life…
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January 6th, 2008 at 9:25 pm
1. idk
2. to position her face
3. it is still wet
4. I'm getting a thought…… they arn't that psychic
5. abbreviated is not abbreviated so we know what to
abbreviate
6. *looks at the finger* Looks round to me!
7. idk
8. Because there is no such thing as perfection.
9. Rain's sound: Pitter pitter pat
Snow's sound:
10. It is only the start of the end
11. To get the voices out of my head
12. Minute Maid is the only one
13. As Dave Ramsey says, "To make you broker and broker
and broker."
14. What was the name of the first one?
15. idk
16. I named them 'Bob.' Now, what about Bob?
17. Why isn't there a Robin flavored cat food?
18. No, because you need to throw the kitty!
19. Interesting!
20. It is AM somewhere!
21. China is the far east, USA is the far west.
They'd call it American.
22. oh oh, the Dukebug?
23. I'm still figuring out the color for Dennis Rodman!
24. It is a deadly habit?
25. Pants are put on 1 leg at a time, Bras are just put on.
26. You can, but they must be trespassing
27. So the cops know who to look for.
28. If it makes sense, do the opposit
29. We drive in a parkway and park in a driveway. Why not?
30. To cussion the blow.
31. idk
32. hypotheticaly, Yes
33. With his snowshoes.
34. Ironcaily, some 7-11s are open only 7 to 11
35. That would defet the purpose of the Black Box.
36. They should be called government fighters.
37. R O F D! (Roll on floor dying)
38. With the four stomachs? That's udderly impossible!
39. I can see clearly now the space is gone. ß^P
40. If you see them, Join them.
41. Because it didn't get scared on the "Fright" Train.
42. That is a whole diffrent bag of wool!
43. I guess we just want them to be apart of a whole.
44. They are the real Freedom Fighters!
45. If I get my tail on the tail of the plane, I'll save my tail!
(Mark Lowery)
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January 6th, 2008 at 11:01 pm
These are great questions.
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